Wow, I have to rewrite this page. I am no longer 26 but 34. I will soon be turning 35 and I wonder what changes I will have made by then. Quick "about me" since we started the previous attempt. I have gained and lost a lot of weight. I have seen doctors and been diagnosed with Type II Diabetes. I have explored the Keto Diet, Fasting, and given up on a lot. I have trained for and completed two triathlons and then when I stepped up to the Olympic length triathlon, I failed. I went into a bit of a tailspin feeling like a failure. I do not want to feel that way anymore. As you can see, if you check and do the math, I have gained 63 lbs since we last started...81 lbs if you include the 18 lbs that I lost during the short duration that we did this last time. Wow...I have been super successful at gaining weight...woot woot! Now, I will be just as successful at other stuff, too.
Previously on Brian's Page for the BBBB:
(Originally written 5/9/2010)
I'm 26 years old. I have been a relatively big guy for as long as I can remember. In grade school, I was one of the fat kids. In junior high, I had little to no self-esteem and one major contributor was being overweight. In high school, I didn't dare ask girls out because I knew I would be shot down. Even now in my adult life I have feared dating because I knew that any relationship would end up as they always do. I would get a lame excuse about how something's not right. It's not you, it's me! I just need space! I don't really ever know what's wrong with me but I figure that there has been one constant in my life and that has to be the real reason. My XX-largeness!!! I am a firm believer that our perception of what others think of us is made up wholly in our own brains. In my mind, no girl has ever been nor will ever be satisfied with my body. Why is that? The reason is simple, I am not satisfied with it. It is high time that I stop putting thoughts/words into other people's minds and mouths and become happy with who I am for me. Of course, there is the added bonus of crushing Marcus and Adam in our competition.
I look at weight loss as a means to an end. So, what are my real goals?! My first goal in life is to be man of God, including a worthy husband and father someday. A man who may be looked upon by others and have said about him, "I know who he is and it's men like him that give this world hope." I know that right now this can't be said of me. I may be an alright guy but I have many flaws, including my Sailor's mouth (golf course, anyone?). I have always viewed my weight as a minor flaw compared to many other things and believe that is one reason that I have not really had the desire to change it. There have been times where I have wanted to change but did not have the burning desire to change myself. There have been times in my life where I have mustered up enough energy to lose some weight for a girl but once she's gone it's back to my old self. I'm aiming for a holistic change now. I am addressing every part of me so that a year from now I can look back and say, if only to myself, "Look how far I've come!"
Previously on Brian's Page for the BBBB:
(Originally written 5/9/2010)
I'm 26 years old. I have been a relatively big guy for as long as I can remember. In grade school, I was one of the fat kids. In junior high, I had little to no self-esteem and one major contributor was being overweight. In high school, I didn't dare ask girls out because I knew I would be shot down. Even now in my adult life I have feared dating because I knew that any relationship would end up as they always do. I would get a lame excuse about how something's not right. It's not you, it's me! I just need space! I don't really ever know what's wrong with me but I figure that there has been one constant in my life and that has to be the real reason. My XX-largeness!!! I am a firm believer that our perception of what others think of us is made up wholly in our own brains. In my mind, no girl has ever been nor will ever be satisfied with my body. Why is that? The reason is simple, I am not satisfied with it. It is high time that I stop putting thoughts/words into other people's minds and mouths and become happy with who I am for me. Of course, there is the added bonus of crushing Marcus and Adam in our competition.
I look at weight loss as a means to an end. So, what are my real goals?! My first goal in life is to be man of God, including a worthy husband and father someday. A man who may be looked upon by others and have said about him, "I know who he is and it's men like him that give this world hope." I know that right now this can't be said of me. I may be an alright guy but I have many flaws, including my Sailor's mouth (golf course, anyone?). I have always viewed my weight as a minor flaw compared to many other things and believe that is one reason that I have not really had the desire to change it. There have been times where I have wanted to change but did not have the burning desire to change myself. There have been times in my life where I have mustered up enough energy to lose some weight for a girl but once she's gone it's back to my old self. I'm aiming for a holistic change now. I am addressing every part of me so that a year from now I can look back and say, if only to myself, "Look how far I've come!"
I look forward to the day when I can bend down to pick something up off the floor and not have to come up for air if I miss it on the first attempt. I look forward to the day when I can hike Mt. Timpanogos and not have to make everyone else wait on me. I look forward to holding my wife, my children, and other loved ones close and not having my stomach come between us. I am glad that I have decided to join this competition and pray that as I make life changing decisions I may stick to them and make them a part of who I am.
Alright, now with all that gay mushy stuff behind me, it's time to assess the situation:
DAY 1 - Go Time!!!
